I never realized that the patriarchal structure of the Christianity I grew up in determined how I related to God. It blew my mind. I felt the need to shout it from the rooftops:
I knew something was missing!
And while men and women might naturally gravitate toward a more masculine or feminine expression of their own spirituality, this inclination is independent of gender. Our personalities, religious histories, and exposure play a role.
If you are new to this topic, Sue Monk Kidd explains the difference between masculine and feminine expressions in this way:
“Often competitiveness, logic, objectivity, and matters of the head have found preeminence over concerns with inclusiveness, relatedness, or matters of the heart.
I recognized the imbalance in the way dogma, theological rightness, triumph of the “Christian way,” oratorical sermons, church business, nationalism, individual pursuit, conversion figures, and breaking scripture down into its various hermeneutics have frequently been valued over feelings, tears, peace, gentleness, group consciousness, and gathering humanity together as a family…”
I tried to imagine a church where it mattered less what your beliefs and practices were and more how relationships were nurtured and healed.”
As our world shifts egalitarian, as women are seen as equally human, equally valuable, equally loved and cherished by God, more women will tell their stories, lead movements, and spark change, and the patriarchal system will not hold.
In its place, masculine and feminine forms of spirituality will be equally embraced, and our spiritual lives will be enriched in a way that I believe could spark a revolution, one that might reverse the ever-declining number of those in the next generations refusing religious association altogether.
Did you know that 25% of the American population agrees with the statement I’m spiritual but not religious?
In A Brief History of Everything, Ken Wilber writes, “…one poll showed a staggering 75 percent of millennials agreed” with that same statement. Gen Z was too young to poll at the time, but based on recent polling, their numbers of spiritual but not religious are even higher.
When we finally humanize the feminine in a way that has been avoided, disgraced, and even forbidden across the centuries, we’ll open doors to the teenagers and young adults who initially assumed faith had nothing for them.
This understanding will cast a wider net and help more of us embrace a fuller experience of what faith, religion, and spirituality could be.
Masculine expressions prioritize dogma, rightness, and objective matters of the head.
Feminine expressions are inclusive, feeling, and relational matters of the heart.
The focus of church history and theological degrees have been around masculine expressions of Christianity, and while these expressions aren’t inherently wrong, many have been to the utter neglect of the feminine form.
But the spiritual and religious landscapes are changing.
For those who have decided faith is still worthwhile, it doesn’t look the same.
The next generation is more conscious of the variety of expressions, and if the church doesn’t embrace the changing tide and become more inclusive, they will lose more of us.
This masculine-leaning system of values is not working anywhere, and the evidence is everywhere, from the decline in religious association to political polarization to the ever-increasing wage disparity.
But there is a Christianity that includes all of our experiences, the masculine and the feminine, and it is richer and deeper, and it will draw people in from the outside.
This new Christianity will mobilize and captivate a new generation that knows It is only good news if it is good news for everyone.
“I tried to imagine a church where it mattered less what your beliefs and practices were and more how relationships were nurtured and healed.”
The Christian focus on organization, events, and conversions has grown stale, and although they are necessary to grow, they will wither without the prioritization of peace, consciousness, and relationship.
I’ve read that churches that stay the same as the worldview shifts egalitarian will likely die within a generation or two.
This has happened before.
The Church Fathers in the first centuries of Christianity who held out that women didn’t have souls to save died, and their beliefs died with them.
The church leaders who held out that slavery was ordained by God even after slaves were set free died, and their beliefs died with them.
In the same way, those who believe that women are inferior and that these masculine expressions are the primary way to be a Christian will die, and their beliefs will die with them.
We have so much to learn about feminine spirituality, the earth and dirt and body of our faith.
We’ll overcorrect before we come back to the middle, but it is a necessary course correction. Every first step is a bold one.
Welcome to the feminine spirituality era.